How long does it take to get over an abusive relationship?

I have been out of a physical/verbal abusive relationship for 8 years now. After the break up - I had him arrested - I fell into a pattern of self-abuse - drinking too much, pot smoking on occasion. Well its been 3 years since I gave up the party girl habits and I feel damn good about myself - maybe the best I've felt in my life. BUT...I just don't trust men not to be jerks. I get asked out/hit on on a fairly regular basis - but I just am not motivated to let my guard down or get to know a guy because I've just seen too much bad behavior. I don't want to be this cynical for the rest of my life. Any advice on how I can start to trust again and good places to meet nice guys? They have to exist, right? I mean, my brother is a great guy.